Girl Rising

Last night I saw the documentary, Girl Rising. Since, on average, I see about one movie a year in the theater, this was quite significant--and more so because showings are few and far between. I choose my movies carefully (especially the ones I pay $10 for), but this one was worth every penny. (A BIG thanks to my friend, Kimber, for telling me about it.)

The documentary tells the true story of nine girls from different countries around the world, who for different reasons face extreme opposition when it comes to their education, freedom, and safety. Seven of the nine girls portray themselves in the film, which makes it extremely powerful. Two were portrayed by actors because these girls literally risked their lives to tell their stories and would certainly be killed if their identities were revealed. 

Initially, I was worried about seeing this film because it is rated PG-13 for disturbing material. I usually avoid disturbing stuff, and, in the past, I've regretted seeing movies, like Slumdog Millionaire. (That one was even edited when I saw it, and I still couldn't handle it.) I'm just a sensitive person. 

But this movie was inspiring! Even though the stories were filled with tragedy, they also rang with hope. And the very disturbing parts of their stories were told delicately and appropriately. If this is the rating spectrum, I would put the movie here: 

                G                             PG                         PG-13                        R

   [------------------------] [---------------------] [-X-----------------] [------------------------]

I was very happy that the film makers chose to make the movie the way they did instead of graphically showing the tragic circumstances of these girls' lives. This way, it opens the opportunity for more (and younger) girls to see the film than it would have otherwise. 

It is a movie that will stay with me. I just keep thinking about these girls. And they are real.  

Ruksana lives on the streets of India--on the pavement under a tent-- but, amazingly, has a loving, intact family. Her parents are sacrificing everything they have to put their three girls through school. It's a dangerous place to live, so sometimes she has to stay in a shelter to protect herself from thugs. 

Senna lives in a gold-mining town called La Rinconada on the cliffs in Peru and has probably never seen a tree in her life. It is the highest inhabited city in the world, and the conditions are terrible. But, even after her father dies, she chooses to stay in school and protect herself from anything that could lead her to working in a brothel. She is courageous and virtuous, and she knows her strength. And I have to admit, I felt just awful sitting there, watching her story, with a gold ring on my finger. Oh, the problems in our world. 

Suma, from Nepal, was bonded into slavery as a six-year-old. She worked from 4 am until late at night, was beaten, and denied education. As I watched, my heart ached. Although bonded labor was made illegal in 2000 in Nepal, only recently has it begun to stop. Suma was rescued by a man who convinced her master to let him teach her to read and write. They started a night school, and eventually one of her other female teachers demanded that her master let her go. He didn't at first, but this teacher came back day after day to argue with him about the law. And eventually, he let her go. Now Suma is free, and she works to free other girls who are still illegally held as slaves. 

Wadley, a darling, imaginative girl, lost everything except her mother after the earthquake in Haiti. She feels her life must be important since it was spared, but there is no money for school, and she longs to be there. So she just goes. And when the teacher says she has to leave, she doesn't. She stands up and says she will keep coming back until she lets her stay. And so the teacher lets her stay. 

Most of all, I keep thinking about the girl (her true name wasn't revealed) from Afghanistan, who was forced into an arranged marriage by her parents at eleven years old. She had lived in a part of the country where the Taliban did not have a strong grip, so she learned to read and write as a young girl. But her education stopped when she was married. With the money her parents got from the arrangement, they bought a used car for their son. I didn't want to believe it. Any of it! She immediately got pregnant--at eleven years old.  And, surprisingly, she didn't die in childbirth-- which according to the movie is the number one cause of death for girls ages 15-18 world wide. As she tells her story her words are powerful. She says that even though she was born into a place where she is treated like a slave, she will rise up and be the change for her country. I only hope this is true. 

The stories of these girls were humbling. I've always known I was privileged, but it's so easy to focus on what you don't have instead of what you have. As I snuggled under the warm covers in bed last night, holding an expensive down pillow--I just felt spoiled, in an unjust way. I have large, comfortable, carpeted, safe place to live--900 square feet for a mere three people. I have been protected from sexual abuse and assault. I have a college education. I have never gone hungry, except by choice. I have never had to wonder if I was going to die. I have enjoyed freedom my whole life. I have so much. 

So now what to do? The only problem I have with movies like these is that I'm all too aware that watching them does nothing. The world will only change if we act. 

I'm going to start by giving more freely to others around me. I'm going to cherish and use my education. I'm going to help my son recognize and appreciate his education, safety, and freedom. And I'm going to teach him to respect and honor women. Eventually I hope to raise more children-- to all be strong and courageous in defending truth and goodness. And I will love not only the children who are not mine, but all children. I believe that all adults carry the weight of responsibility to protect all children--boys equally as girls. And I will think more deeply about this talk, which addresses many of these issues. 

I think movies like these will help the world if they motivate each of us to do better in our sphere of influence and to give to organizations that are honest and effective.

Busy Other Places

I feel like I haven't posted here as much lately, but it's because I've been writing here:

http://www.ateachermom.com/2013/03/19/book-review-last-child-in-the-woods-saving-our-children-from-nature-deficit-disorder/

http://www.ateachermom.com/2013/03/21/finding-nature-in-the-city-a-general-guide-for-apartment-living/

http://www.ateachermom.com/2013/03/30/finding-nature-in-the-city-part-3-houston/

And I've been editing here:

http://powerofmoms.com/2013/03/all-hail-the-kangaroo/

http://powerofmoms.com/2013/03/a-deep-uncomfortable-patience/

http://powerofmoms.com/2013/03/spiritual-sundays-matzah-and-motherhood/

As you can see, I've been having fun. I hope you enjoy these. :-)

Power of Moms

So in the last two weeks I took on a new, fun project. I am now a volunteer editor for The Power of Moms. My friend, Rachel, helped me get involved, and I'm so grateful to her!

I had been a casual reader of The Power of Moms for some time, bu nowt it's so fun to be on the inside of things. When I edit articles, I can't wait to see them published! Here is one that I really liked:

http://powerofmoms.com/2013/03/unrushed-moments/

And, really, I like all their articles. They post one every day, and they are idea-sparking and inspiring.

Also, I will be attending this retreat in May. Does anyone in the SLC area want to join me? http://powerofmoms.com/premium-retreat-in-park-city-ut-may-4-2013/

It does cost quite a bit of money, and so do some of the programs on the site. BUT I just found out that as a board member I can do a Power of Moms giveaways! I can't give away retreats, but I can give way programs. So I'll keep you all posted.

Tender Mercies

The most amazing thing happened yesterday. But to understand the story, I need to give some background.

My sister, Marie, is serving as a missionary for the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints in the South Dakota Rapid City Mission. She received her assignment less than 6 weeks after President Monson announced a change in the age requirement for missionaries. For years, girls have had to wait until age 21 to serve, while boys could serve at 19. Now, boys can go at 18 and girls can go at 19!

This change in policy was life changing for our family-- and a tender mercy all on its own. Marie, who does not turn 21 until September, really wanted to serve. But the timing of her birthday was inconvenient considering her education schedule. When the prophetic announcement was made, Marie and my mom (and me) started crying because we knew what this would mean for Marie--and for the Church, and for missionary work, and for women all over the world.

And it meant Marie could go immediately! Within just a few weeks, she submitted her application, which is quite a feat considering that the process requires a physical exam, dental exam, multiple interviews, etc. And just a few weeks after that, she received her call to South Dakota. She reported to the Missionary Training Center on Feburary 20th, and just a week ago Monday she arrived in Rapid City. There, she received her first assignment to serve in Gillette, WY (pictured above).

Mare's mission covers North and South Dakota and parts of Wyoming, Iowa, and Minnesota. I'm not sure on the exact stats, but I would be willing to bet that Marie's mission has the lowest population density of any mission in the United States. There just aren't a lot of people who live up there. In fact, before yesterday, if you had asked me if I knew anyone that lived in her mission boundaries, I would have told you, "Nope, not a one."

But when I found out she was assigned to serve in Gillette, I thought the name sounded familiar (and not because of the razor company). I told my mom, "I think I've heard of Gillette. I must know someone from there, because otherwise, why would I have ever heard of it?"

Gillette is a town of 30,000 (which is big for Wyoming), but it's in the northeastern part of the state-- far away from Yellowstone and the other big Wyoming attractions. I had never been anywhere near it. I did a quick search on Facebook to see if anything would come up if I typed in Gillette or Wyoming. No luck. Oh well, I must have been wrong. So I didn't think much of it after that.

But last night, my friend Crystal (who served with me as a missionary in South Africa) wrote on my wall: "Guess who I met tonight??? Um a wonderful sister missionary by the last name of Sheranian :D Yep she's serving in my town (Gillette, WY)!! She says hi and that she loves you :D"

And then it all clicked. Crystal is from Alaska, but I do remember seeing something on Facebook about her getting a teaching job in Gillette!

And so the tender mercy: Marie, during her first week as a missionary (which is usually filled with a roller-coaster of emotions as you realize you are with people you don't know, doing something you don't really know how to do, in a place you don't know, and you're going to be there for a year and a half!) meets the one and perhaps ONLY person that anyone in her family knows in her entire mission boundaries. Not only that, but the person she meets was someone that her sister served with as a missionary. Someone who is very familiar with the name tag Sister Sheranian (and even knows how to pronounce it). Some may say it was coincidence, but to me-- and I'm sure to Marie-- it was a tender mercy. 

A tender mercy is a gift from God-- an event where a small, almost coincidental miracle occurs. Nothing big. But to believers, it is a sign that God is watching over them. 

And God is watching over Marie. He is in the details of her life, and yours, and mine. I forget that so often. But in moments like these, it is undeniable. 


. . . . .


So just a few hours after finishing this post, I experienced the power of tender mercies again! 

I was shopping at Costco and saw a woman I know from church a couple checkout lines down from me. Her cart was FULL of food, which I knew was to feed her growing kids. I wasn't close enough to say hello, but after I checked out and started walking towards the exit, I saw her again. This time she was talking to the cashier and looked distressed. So I walked up to her and asked if she needed help. She explained that her husband had taken her checkbook and debit card and that she had nothing to pay with! 

It was so amazing to me that I was there at exactly the right time. So I swiped my credit card and she arranged to pay me. I didn't feel any particular prompting to be at Costco at that exact time, but I did feel prompted to go up to her and ask what was wrong. I could have easily walked past, and I'm so glad I didn't! There is nothing better than becoming a tool in the Lord's hands to work a tender mercy for someone else. 

My Sweet 14-Month-Old

My friend, Olya, took these adorable pictures of Isaac. Isn't he a cutie? My favorites are the last two. But these raccoon ones melt my heart as well. :-) Actually, let's be honest: I love them all! 

I love this age! I think I've felt that way about every age, but it just keeps getting more fun. Isaac loves to read, and he will bring books to me throughout the day. His new thing is that he hands me a book and then runs to the couch because he knows that's where we sit to read. I love it when he sits on my lap and rests his head against my chest. It's our time to relax.

Isaac is a really good eater, but drinking has been a challenge for us. He is officially weaned, and really, it was the smoothest transition ever. I was the one that had been pushing nursing for the last 3 months because I was worried about his liquid intake and diet (due to his allergies). But my milk dried up, and nursing became a futile cause. So, we just stopped, and he hasn't even cared. Talk about an easy transition.

But getting him to drink enough has not been easy. I put sippy cups around the house, but if it were up to him, he would drink less than 8 oz a day. So, I offer, offer, offer. If I offer a lot and spoon feed him a bowl of cereal and oat milk, he can get around 20 oz down-- but that is still 4 oz shy of what is supposedly the absolute minimum he's supposed to be drinking. ACK! Any suggestions there? We did buy a straw cup, but I'm still not sure if he prefers that. We've tried Nesquick in the oat milk. I even blended up fresh strawberries to make a smoothie-like drink, and he wouldn't drink that. So the only things he drinks are watered-down juice and water. I'm hoping this is just a phase and that he will start liking chocolate oat milk. What kid doesn't like chocolate milk?

His new skills include walking backwards (he does it when he's trying to see what's on top of the counter), spinning in circles, crawling up the stairs (I let him climb all the staircases in our complex as we s-l-o-w-l-y make our way to the mail box), eating with a fork, and saying a few words! He is not a big talker and rarely says these words, but he has said all of them multiple times on his own:

dada
ba (ball)
teh-teh (Teddy)
buh (book)
buh-buh (bubble)
nuh-nuh (no no)
puh-puh (poke poke) -- This is what we tell him to do when he's eating with a fork.
ickle ickle (tickle)

The thing he says the most is "DUH!" Which is pretty much the equivalent of "THAT!" He points and says "duh!" to whatever he wants. It's cute, but I'm excited for him to become more verbal.

Life with a one-year-old is very sweet.

Laughing at Myself

Usually I have a hard time laughing at myself, but today Brent and I had a good, hard laugh about a naive mistake I made.

Today when I was walking into Costco, I noticed a woman walking out who had a big black smudge on her forehead.

I thought, "Oh dear. When that poor woman gets home and looks in the mirror, she's going to think, 'Why didn't anyone tell me I had a huge smudge on my face?!"'

But then, as I walked through the store I saw other women with this strange black mark, so I thought, "There must be a booth where they are offering free samples of some strange beauty product.'

As I continued through the store, I saw another woman who didn't have the mark and thought, "Ah, see she didn't get a free sample. When they offer me one, I'm not going to get it either." However, I never saw the booth, checked out, went on with my day, and never thought anything of it. Until Brent came home and I told him the story.

"The weirdest thing happened today," I said, "It was like from a sitcom." And I told him the story. I didn't get  through more than one sentence when he said, "It's Ash Wednesday."

Boy, did we laugh.

How dense can I be? Well let me just say that I don't remember ever in my life seeing someone observe Ash Wednesday. Maybe I have, but not that I remember. Brent says he has only seen people observe it since moving to Houston. I guess my other two Ash Wednesdays in Houston must have been spent at home-- or in stores where the less-devout shop. (Which could be true since today I went to Walmart after Costco, and there was not an ash to be seen. I doubt there's a correlation, but since I didn't see anyone outside of Costco with the mark, it did support my free-sample theory.)

Ah well, it was all worth a good laugh!

Four Seasons

About a week ago I was taking a walk with Isaac on a beautiful warm day. Technically, it was winter since it was January-- and most of the trees are bare, but the warm sunshine felt reminiscent of summer. At the same time, the crisp breeze and floating leaves made it seem like fall, and the blooming flowers and a passing butterfly made me think, "Wait, is it spring?"

Who says Houston doesn't have four seasons? We just experience them simultaneously.

Hypothyroid Update

It's been two months now since I started taking medication for hypothyroid, and I can feel such a difference! Yesterday, I worked out, took Isaac to the park, ran an errand, cooked dinner, and tidied up the house-- ALL IN THE SAME DAY!!! You have no idea what a miracle that is for me. In 2012, there was not one day when I did ALL of those things, and especially without taking a nap, or laying down on the couch at least 3 times. I feel like myself again. And it feels so good! I'm actually crying as I write this because I feel so, so grateful to be back to normal.

Sleeping Through the Night

I just have to share with you, friends, a personal victory: I am sleeping through the night! This is a big deal--because between getting up to go to the bathroom while pregnant, getting up for a baby, and dealing with post-baby sleep anxiety and other sleep problems, I haven't been able to sleep for 7-8 hours straight for about 2 years. We finally taught Isaac to sleep completely through the night (7:30 pm to 7:30 am) in November, but it still took me a long time after that to not wake up.

Part of the problem is that I am a super light sleeper: when the AC kicks on, I wake up. So, when the AC runs 300 nights out of the year, that's a lot of disrupted sleep. But another big problem is what I've learned to call my "sleep hygiene," a term used in the book Emotional Intelligence 2.0. I picked up this book initially to help me with one of my new year's resolutions (to increase my emotional capacity). In it, the authors (Travis Bradberry & Jean Greaves) suggest "cleaning up your sleep hygiene" in order to improve self-management (or the ability to manage your own emotions). For me, this was a no-brainer connection. I clearly can control my emotions better when I get enough sleep. But what they discussed as far as "cleaning up" sleep was new to me.

To get better quality sleep, they suggested to 1) Get twenty minutes of morning sunlight, 2) Turn off the computer at least two hours before bedtime, 3) Keep your bed for sleeping (don't work on your laptop in bed), and 4) Avoid caffeine. For me #1 and #2 have not been happening. And so this week I've worked on getting outside in the morning and not using the computer at night. And it's worked. I have slept so much better. I also get to bed earlier because I'm not on the computer to get sucked into doing something (that is probably unnecessary) for an hour.

Another book that helped me was The No-Cry Sleep Solution, by Elizabeth Pantly. I just love this book. She is opposed to cry-it-out, which I am not.... but the book is still the best I've read on getting babies to sleep. Her tone is one of experience and empathy, and the book is well-organized (none of which I can say about Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child). One of the book's gems is the last chapter, "Baby's Sleeping (Finally!) but Mommy's Not." She has some great pointers:

• Pay off your sleep debt (at least what you can) by sleeping as much as possible the first few weeks after your baby is sleeping through the night
• Set your body clock by going to bed and waking up at the same times every day
• Take time during the day to write out a to-do list to avoid creating a mental one while lying in bed at night (I have a big problem with this one!)
• Avoid caffeine and watch for the side effects of meds you might be taking
• Exercise (she gives a great list of baby mom-friendly ways to make this happen)
• Make your bedroom comfortable (temperature, noise, light, etc.)
• Have your own bedtime routine
• Eat right and light before sleep
• Encourage relaxation (repeat a familiar mediation (like a scripture), breath slowly while repeating one calming word, use progressive relaxation to relax all your muscles)

I haven't tried all of these things, but now that I've written this list, I'm definitely going to make more adjustments to my routine. I'm hoping that armed with this information (and hopefully new habits) I will able to sleep much better this next year! And hopefully that means I'll be easier to live with too. :-)

Feeding a Child with Allergies

Isaac has quite a few allergies. I haven't taken him to see an allergist yet because 1) it is expensive 2) none of his allergies seem to be life-threatening 3) I have been able to figure out most things he is allergic to on my own and 4) I'm hoping he will grow out of them in a couple years.

In the mean time, we are avoiding milk, rice, soy, bananas, peaches, and nuts (because there is a good chance he could be allergic to them). I am also suspicious of beans in general, but have to do more testing on that one. This means I can't give him bananas, yogurt, or cheese-- which are all convenient, easy-to-eat, high-calorie, baby-friendly foods. And I can't give him rice puffs or anything with milk in the ingredients, which pretty much eliminates everything made for toddlers in the grocery store. I also can't give him tofu or peanut butter-- which normally I would have used as good alternative fat and protein sources. I think this is why he is 21 lbs and in the 16th percentile for weight. (A very healthy weight but definitely on the small side for my family.)

Now these issues are not nearly as difficult as having a child with grain allergies/intolerances or life-threatening allergies. Isaac can still eat bread and pasta. And he can eat cheerios and graham crackers, which he loves. I don't have to worry about being in the same room as a peanut butter sandwich or monitoring his every bite, thank goodness.

The hard part is figuring out what to wean him to. Most babies his age drink cows milk, but that is not an option. And neither is soy, rice, or almond milk. (I actually am going to try rice milk in a few months to see how he does with that one.) Our pediatrician encouraged me to continue nursing him until 18 months and gave me samples of Alimentum, a formula made by Similac. I made pancakes with it (because Isaac refused to drink it after multiple attempts), and Isaac didn't tolerate it well. Thankfully, Dr. Lindsay also gave me a sample of Neocate, a prescription formula that costs $55 a tin (I think insurance can cover it if you really need it.). This  formula is 100% dairy free and pretty much soy free (there is a little soy). The proteins are broken down to the level of amino acids, so it virtually eliminates the possibility of an allergic reaction. I made pancakes with this, and so far so good. I have two cans of it and I'm hoping I can get one more free from the company (I sent in a request).

I'm not sure what I really wanted the point of this post to be. But I guess I just want to acknowledge the miracle that it has been to nurse Isaac for this long. It is a blessing we really, really needed considering his allergies. And I want to say that if you are feeding a child with allergies, I understand. It is a stressful puzzle.